Do not flatter yourself in thinking this letter is for you, since John is a rather generic name used to describe the indistinguishable male, hence, John Doe.
Since loving you, I have not loved anyone, including and especially myself.
If actions speak louder than words, mine screamed out for help. I used to write every night since I was young but I didn’t write while I was with you. I used to run and hang out with my friends almost every day, but I cannot remember but a few nights when I did that when we were together. I used to listen to music and sing in the car, unconcerned of whether if I was rocking out to ghetto hip hop or bumping with pop rock, but you changed the station every time it didn’t fit your mood which was usually always. I used to think I was cute, but now I can’t eat without thinking about how I’m going to look in my skinny jeans. I used to be able to remember things so well I could tell you about my 14th birthday party play by play but now I can’t remember what the fuck I’ve been doing with my life recently.
Since leaving you, I have not loved anyone more than myself.
You stole everything I was to keep me to yourself while I lost myself in you. Now I have to start from scratch recapturing who I am.
At some point or another I may have told you a secret in the silent confidence that you would listen and learn. All you ever proved was that you could take advantage of a situation. Now you will just have to prove yourself twice over for me to trust you again. I probably won’t like I did, and you can thank yourself.
Believe me, if you think you have scars, wait until you see mine. It’s not easy being me, or you, or anyone for that matter, so get over yourself, please.
If there’s anything I want you to remember from this letter, it’s this: don’t ever come between a girl and her daddy or big brother or little sister. It would be a sick and twisted world the moment a boy could pluck a girl from the people she loves the most without consequences or repercussions.
So until I find a Jack or Jimmy that separates himself from all you John Does of the world I will live my life peacefully, contentedly, independently and without regard to what you think. Because frankly, my dear John, I don’t give a damn.
Sincerely,
Jane.
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